We are on the threshold of Spring.. Like I said before this is my year and a lot of the old ghosts from 2010 are being exercised. One place in my home that holds major energy is my closet.

Clothes holds memories.. All you have to do is look at a sweater or a dress and memories come rushing to you like a tsunami. Good memories, bad memories, passionate ones, apathetic ones... Memories.. All held in the fibers of your clothing. Clothes reflect our mood or where we are emotionally in life at the time. Colors. Red passion.. Pink love.. Blue trustworthy.. Green peacefulness.. Gray apathy.. Black trying to look thinner.. The feel of leather, lace, silk, satin, denim, charmuse, cotton invoke emotions.. Feelings.. Clothes touch so many of our senses. My love affair with clothes started with working for

I had the most glamorous manager. She was the ultimate taste-maker in my eyes. Everything about her was exotic and refined, even her name bespoke of elegant mystery. I would reveal her cool ass name because I want to respect her privacy. Oddly enough she has moved to West Virginia and is farming and raising chickens. Who would have known the fashionable lady clad in St. John suits and diamonds the size of grapes would be digging in the dirt.

With time and experience (a better paycheck) I started shopping here

and here

Flash forward to the Oracle at the Nut Hut.. All I wear are sweats and tennis shoes. No need for sky high heels or luxurious silks. Although I spend the majority of my time dressed down, I still dress like I used to when I work in the jewelry department a few hours a week.  I suppose that balance keeps me sane. I might do restraint holds on kids but I am still a glamanista. After all I AM wearing a Gucci watch while I am holding them down.

Well.. It is time to lighten my load. I have been carting around clothes that are too small for years.. I had the hope upon hope that I would one day fit back into them. I mean come on. Channel skirts and Gucci sweaters NEVER go out of style. Buuuut.. I need to be realistic. I am NEVER going to be a size 2 again.. And until I get out of this unhappy rut (IE get out of the nut hut) I am never going to lose weight. When I am miserable I am fat.. When I am happy I am thin. Time to let go of the past. Time for the clothes to go.

I have to say cleaning out my closet has been extremely therapeutic for me. I've laughed, I've cried, I've reminisced.. Some stuff still have the tags on them so I wonder why the hell did I buy it? All of it is going to the Goodwill.. I thought about taking it to a resale shop but I really really believe in my heart the Goodwill is the place for these clothes. They will be well appreciated. They will once again be loved as I loved them. I am giving them a chance at a new life rather than eternity in the catacombs of my closet.

I am not finished yet, but each bag of clothes, shoes, coats, and accessories I pull out makes me feel lighter.. Hopeful.. Connected to myself in a way I have been disconnected in years. Thanks for the memories clothes! But I won't need to rely on you so heavily in the future. I am spending less time on who I was and what I could have been and focusing on who I am and who I am going to be.


The Process of looking for a job is.. Well.. Daunting and very labor intensive. Seriously.. I can see why people stay in positions they despise for years until they retire, get fired, or finally lose it and shoot up the workplace. 

I finally took the plunge and started SERIOUSLY looking for a job. Honestly, for about six months or so I was just giving it lip service. I SAID I wanted to get a new job. I even prayed for a new job, but I did little to nothing to make it happen.. I would pursue Monster or Hot Jobs for a few minutes then get sidetracked by Twitter or some flash sale on the Internet and abandon my job search as quickly as  rich people got off the Titanic. Things have changed.. I am at the end or the end of my rope. I don’t even have threads in my hands.. I am DONE.

Sooo.. Now I am HONESTLY putting a lot of energy into looking for a better position. I mean hell.. What do I have to lose? One thing I am finding out, my job is paying me basically beads and blankets laced with syphilis! I knew I wasn’t getting financially compensated for what I was worth but I had NO idea how under market my pay is. I am extra insulted!  I think this new found knowledge makes me even more militant at work. Like. Nat Turner militant. I think my employer is running an indentured servant program. 

Our workweeks consist of 8 days straight then we are given 4 days off. This basically wears us the hell out. If you read any of my tweets concerning the Nut Hut you know how stressful my job is. By day 5 or so I run out of juice. In laymen’s terms.. I don’t care anymore. As long as a kid isn’t bleeding majorly, I don’t want to hear it. Not very therapeutic of me. Another unfortunate byproduct of working 8 on 4 off is you are too exhausted to look for employment elsewhere. You are in the matrix or perhaps a mouse on a little rat wheel running your heart out and getting NOWHERE.

There are success stories I hear. Sometimes people actually make it off of the plantation. One day you see a coworker.. Then.. They just sort of disappear. If you ask about them the standard response is “so and so is no longer with us”. I live for the day when the statement can be applied to my name. This is basically how the conversation will go.. “Hey where is Oracle? Is she on another one of her vacations?” Response “Oracle kick ass though she is, is no longer with us”.  Yeah… They are pretty much going to be saying that about me really soon and that gives me motivation to stay off of twitter and turn my resume into a skeleton key which will open ANY door.

I am not what one would consider a traditional Christian.. Lots of my time is spent studying all sorts of religions, philosophies, and ways of thinking.  I am especially fond of Eastern practices. My patchwork quilt of spirituality to some may seem odd and borderline wacky, however to me it makes total sense. I want to be in a constant state of evolution. Learning. Growing. Evolving.. Bettering myself..

2010 was the year of the Tiger and believe me.. It bit me in the ass.  Multiple times. I was overjoyed when the new Chinese year ushered out the fierce Tiger and brought in the gentle Rabbit. I am a bit biased towards rabbits as many of my closest friends are rabbits. I can business with rabbits. Gentle, charming, kind, sweet, furry harmless creatures. Yeah. Screw you Tiger I am riding with the Rabbit this year!

As I have said.. This is MY YEAR! The year of the Rabbit is a year of peaceful changes all of which I welcome with an open heart. A lot can happen in a Rabbit year but the quote I am hanging on to with dear life is

"Money can be made without too much labor. Our life style will be languid and leisurely as we allow ourselves the luxuries we have always craved for. A temperate year with unhurried pace. For once, it may seem possible for us to be carefree and happy without too many annoyances."

After all the hard work and bullshit  I  endured in the Tiger year... I am totally going to roll with easy money and minimized annoyances. Hell.. Who wouldn't? Yep.. The Rabbit is lucky and I am going to grab it by the foot and hold on for an easy ride! I have earned it.

From me to you.. Happy Year of the Rabbit.. Summertime and the livin is easy!

Every year I do some sort of post on or near Valentine's Day bemoaning how much this day sucks. Like seriously.. It sucks for me. In fact.. Valentine's Day can kiss the darkest part of my ass till the skin is red like those stupid ass hearts full of yucky cheap drugstore chocolate people are so fond of. Since I am working towards being LESS bitter and MORE positive this year.. I am going to take a somewhat different approach to Valentine's Day. This year instead of waiting for some random person to validate me with tokens of love and appreciation.. I will celebrate Valentine's Day in my head.. Sort of like the Matrixesque type dealio. So. Monday was Valentine's Day and this is how I celebrated it.. In my own mind..

Who could say no to breakfast in bed? Especially a light breakfast as something like this will soon follow.

Then why not go for a hot stone massage? Completely relaxing.
Now that I am relaxed I can spend the afternoon SHOE SHOPPING!
We would try to prepare lunch but it would play out more like this
Then somehow this would be slipped on my neck

It would be fun to take a walk on the beach and perhaps a little swimming
Then a romantic dinner on the beach much much much later
Where Georgetown Cupcakes would be served as desert and I would find this hidden on the plate
I could put up more sensual pictures but after all that jewelry I am sure you can figure out how I would show my gratitude.

Yeah.. That is how I spent my Valentine's Day 2011.. I can't wait till next year.

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