I hate my job. There I said it out loud. I seriously hate hate my job. This is such a disappointment to me. Like opening up a festively decorated box then finding out its contents are lack luster and just not what you want AT ALL. Yeah.. That is how I feel about my damn job.

Flash back to June 2009. I just came back from an amazing time in Italy with my Master’s degree freshly minted in my hot little hands. It was time to get a grown up job. Up until this point I never really took any of my employment seriously as it was a stepping stone to get to the next level. Here I am. Next level. So time for my next level job I’ve been working so diligently to obtain.

I KNEW I wanted to work here. So much so, that I only applied to two places. When I got the callback I was extremely elated. The interview went swimmingly well and I was assured as soon as my security check came back I would begin working. My interviewer even said she would put a rush on it. I should have read between the lines. This should have been a red flag of concern.

So.  Two weeks pass and I don’t hear anything. Knowing I used to work for the Federal Government as well as the school system, I didn’t have any cause for concern about the security check. After three weeks I called them. I was told they were sill conducting it and that due to the summer they were short staffed. I gave them the benefit of the doubt. Now a month has passed. I am getting poorer and poorer. Dipping into my savings and even getting help from my Mom to stay afloat. I consider myself a proactive sorta gal so I got a temp job. It wasn’t even in my field and I totally did not put on the application I had a Master’s degree.  I started working this side hustle and found myself sucked into their culture. Little did they know there was a psych in their midst. I was analyzing them every day all day long, and believe me, they provided hella entertainment.

I continued to call expecting results on my background check and was always given some ridic excuse. Finally I gave up. Unfortunately, all the other new graduates had sucked up all the prime job offers in the psych field. I was forced to continue working this side hustle till something panned out. THEN.. IN OCTOBER I received a call saying not only was I hired but also could I come in this FRIDAY for training. Are they serious? Is this for real? I was so desperate to start working what I considered a “real Job” that I literally jumped at the chance. I was further astounded by the financial compensation this job offered.. Can people really get paid this little? They hid behind the whole non-profit crapola as a reason for paying me a fraction of what other people with similar jobs earn. Ok. Whatever. I need this job.

It didn’t take long for me to learn my long-winded hiring process was typical of this organization. They have a rep for screwing everyone over all of the time. The longer I worked there the more it made sense they have an ad in the paper every single week looking for employees. The turnover rate here is astronomical. Many of the people who trained me were jaded and bitter. The whole atmosphere seemed to be heavy with despondency and anger. During orientation I gave serious thought to looking for other employment.

So here we are. In March of 2010.. I HATE working here. My place of employment is called the Nut Hut. None of my friends even know the actual title of the facility. The clients are engaged teens who spend the majority of their days plotting on escaping, having sex, getting over, or worse.. Hurting staff… Since I have been there, I can personally attest to several clients sending staff members to the HOSPIOTAL and the company will not allow us to file assault charges against them. Wanna know why? For each client, the Nut Hut gets $800,000.00 a year. Non-profit right? They want to keep the beds full at the risk of the safely of the staff. We are basically the punching bags of the clients. I won’t even add that there are several biters, spitters, and kids who enjoy throwing pee on staff.

Example. A nurse was punched in the side of the head. Walked less than three feet and passed out. She was taken to the hospital with a concussion. She suffered nerve damage and her eye still isn’t fully functioning. The punishment for the client? A mark on her daily sheet. THAT IS IT!

Example. A tech was in a restraint with an enraged child and tore ligaments in his leg. He was unable to work for several months after his surgery. The Nut Hut made it impossible for him to come back so he quit.

Example. A client hit a coworker with a CHAIR breaking his arm. This coworker damn near had to file bankruptcy while he was out of  work. Then when he did return they put him on the same unit as the client who attacked him.

Example A client was so enraged she kicked down a steel door, ripped a toilet off the floor, bit a staff member to the point of almost having to have stitches, terrorized us for weeks, and threatened staff.. She also destroyed thousands of dollars worth of property. She is sleeping peacefully right now in her bed here.

Example. When a certain girl is restrained, she has a technique where she kicks staff members in the knee so violently; they are forced to go to the hospital. This happened to an unlucky female co-worker. I haven’t seen her since.

These are not isolated incidents. This happens here on a weekly basis. Just when I think the worst has happened, something tops it off. Many times, I am in fear of my life. The clients KNOW they can do anything they want, as we are limited in our ability to defend ourselves against them. If a client has it out for you.. You are done. This is very much like prison mentality here but oddly enough the prison system is far more secure than where I work.

I want out. And I mean right now. Although, nothing has happed to me yet, I know by the law of averages my time is coming soon. That makes me afraid. Very very afraid.